7400.201 Courtship Marraige and the Family
Week 14 Chapter 16. Separation and Divorce
A great many Americans are concerned today about the numbers of people divorcing and  about the relative ease with which people dissolve their marriages. A. During the years from 1860 to 1981, the number of divorces per one thousand  people generally increased in the United States.  The rate rose significantly during  World War II, peaked at the conclusion of the war (1945-1947), and then began to decline.  The rate remained fairly stable during the 1950s and the early 1960s and  then increased rapidly again after 1965.  By the mid 1970s, the United States had the highest divorce rate in the Western world.  After 1981, the rates tended to decline.  By 1995, they had gone down to 4.4 per one thousand people, a number  lower than any since the early 1970s.

In response to the increase in divorces, states have changed divorce laws.  The  changes reflect a different perspective on divorce: an individual rather than a  government-controlled decision.  In the 1970s, California and New York began  the trend toward no-fault divorce, which is now practiced in all States.  The  purpose of no-fault divorce laws was to remove some of the acrimony and pain from the process.  In many cases, this aim has been achieved, and proponents argue that no-fault laws also make divorce a more equitable process.  To many Americans, however, no-fault divorce appears to make divorce too easy.  Some states have adopted covenant marriage, wherein the partners agree that they will not divorce except for abuse or adultery.

Reasons for the high divorce rate in the U.S.

 Interpersonal Divorce Process - It is usually a process of Gradual deterioration - "Surprise, I want a divorce!" situations rarely occur. Most often, divorcing couples have ignored the maintenance of their relationship.

Researchers have identified a number of features in the process that are common to most  divorcing couples.  Not all disaffected people divorce, and not all divorces involve disaffection.   When people do divorce, four phases tend to mark the process:
Paul Bohannan discussed divorce in terms of six “stations,” or six different  experiences that people are likely to have.  The emotional divorce involves a loss  of trust, respect, and affection for each other.  The legal divorce is the only one of  the six stations that provides a tangible benefit to the partners: relief from the legal responsibilities of the marriage and the right to remarry.  The economic divorce  involves settlement of the property.  The co-parental divorce is experienced by  those with children: Decisions must be made about who will have custody,  visitation rights, and continuing parental responsibility.  The community divorce  means that each of the partners leaves one community of friends and relations and enters another.  Finally, the psychic divorce is the central separation that occurs.

Identity Reorientation - development of the "single" self is difficult depending on the duration of the marriage. The longer the marriage, the longer reorientation takes. Some factors are associated with the process of redefining oneself: Patterns of Divorce - Not all divorces follow the same pattern of events:

Incidence of Marital Separation.

Factors influencing the probability of divorce
    Demographic Factors: Social Environmental Factors
  1. Greater Social Acceptance of Divorce
  2. Changing Demands on Marriage and Family - fewer socially bound marriages and that the marital relationship often acts to absorb social stress from outside the marriage
  3. Dual-worker Marriages - little time for relationship
  4. Economic Changes - women now have more economic means, making them less dependent on the marriage for financial support.
Relationship Factors D. Personal Factors

Divorce as Process - Not an Event - Most people find out by experience that divorce is a "process" - often taking months (even years) - than a single event. Depending on the degree of commitment to the marriage, and the length of marriage, the process of total divorce may take as long to complete as the marriage took to dissolve. Divorce only dissolves the legal marital relationship, not the emotional, economic, parental, community, or psychic relationships that have evolved.

Effects of Divorce

While social scientists once agreed that it was better for a couple with children to divorce rather than live unhappily with children observing -- now most social scientists agree that the most harmonious outcome for children is to live with their parents - regardless of the quality of the relationship of the parents to each other (barring physical violence or neglect).  There is some degree of emotional trauma suffered by children of divorced parents, depending on the age of children at the time of divorce. In most cases, this is short term. There is also the loss of a confidant and guidance counselor that is the non-custodial parent. Generally - the non-custodial parent (dads in 90% of the cases) begins with prompt child support payments and on time visitations, but gradually slacks off -- so that by the end of the first year he is delinquent in both payments and visits.

However the greatest threat to children is the loss of material wealth. Children living with their mothers are likely to have had to move into other neighborhoods, begin new school system careers, and make new friends at a time when old habits would have offered more comfort. Loss of material wealth causes these emotional upsets. In fact, non-custodial fathers somehow do not pay almost 60% of the court awarded child support payments in any given year. This fact alone is sufficient to force many single parent families into poverty, or just above the poverty line. One child in four (20%) our society lives below the government mandated poverty line (1 child in 3 if we use the poverty line + 25%) and the majority of these children are from single parent families headed by mothers. Contrary to conservative political beliefs, only 35% of these single mothers are members of any minority group. When we look at our society and observe the social problems plaguing us - drugs, runaway children, teenage prostitutes, and increasing crime rates in many areas - it is clear that there is at least one glaring cause of all of this.

If divorce results in 25% to 33% of our children living in or near poverty.....and poverty causes people to break the law to get over hard times .... and law breakers get caught and go to jail ... then in a more or less direct way - divorce is somewhat responsible for much of what we see as problematic in our society. Thinking about the SINGLE PARENT MOTHER - There are at least four areas of crisis: a. responsibility overload b. task overload c. emotional overload d. financial overload.

Factors Related to Divorce (Recap)

 
A. Social scientists have found that it is not just what people do that helps account  for the failure of a marriage, but also certain sociodemographic factors.
The foregoing sociodemographic factors are important, of course, because they  have a bearing on the way people interact.
There are both negative and positive consequences of divorce.
Divorce can be a very painful experience for children. 
Custody arrangements can be very painful for both the parents and the children.  Increasingly in the twentieth century, mothers were granted custody under the “tender years” doctrine. After the mid-1960s, an increasing number of fathers won the right to sole custody.  Joint custody is another option, in which both parents continue to share the responsibility for the care and rearing of the children.  Joint custody arrangements seem to be more satisfying to both children and parents.
 
For children, coping with the disruption of divorce depends in part on the behavior of parents.  Children adjust better to the extent that the divorce reduces the conflict between  the parents.  Divorced parents will help their children adjust to the extent that they have a  sense of control over their child-rearing responsibilities.  If the parents adjust well to a  divorce, then they will help their children to adjust.

Back to Syllabus